Just Go Talk To That Stranger
I was recently talking to a development director at a well-established nonprofit. They had gone through some staff transitions and had a lot of new members on their team, especially in the development department.
I asked how this one new major gift officer was doing.
The director shared – well, they’re nervous to talk to people. They aren’t really comfortable picking up the phone.
Huh?
I get it, talking to people you don’t know can be hard. Nerve-wracking. Overwhelming.
Especially when the person you are speaking to is often older. Might be significantly older. Might be of a different financial status. Might be a different race or gender.
But nonprofit friends – get over it.
🔷 Fundraising is about building relationships 🔷
And to do that, you really need to talk to people. Get to know them. And show them, that you’re worth their time to get to know too.
Several years ago, I was on the road and had a meeting with a donor. I had barely spoken to him before our meeting. I was in my mid-twenties and was traveling solo. I was going from donor meeting to donor meeting, driving in a city I didn’t know (THANK YOU GPS) and pulling up to offices and homes of people I had never met in person.
Was I intimidated?
Sure.
Did I know what the donors I was meeting with would be like?
Absolutely not.
But did I walk into those offices with my head held high? Ready to get to know the donors and ready for them to get to know me?
You bet.
So in this one particular meeting, the donor asked me some, well, personal questions. Age, marital status, the works.
It became clear that this donor was THREE times older than me. We were in his office building (a building he owned) where one rule I was used to was not present - he started to pack his tobacco in a pipe AND SMOKE IT 😱 while we were discussing something related to the nonprofit I worked for.
This northern gal had never seen such a thing.
So here’s the thing for you to takeaway when soliciting a donor (and frankly in life)–
things will happen you cannot expect.
Things will be asked that you do not know the answer to.
A meeting may be cut short.
A donor may be in a bad mood because of something that happened prior to your meeting.
You might type the wrong address into your GPS and go to the wrong place and be 20 minutes late to your meeting (not that that would ever happen to me…)
Those are just some of the things you cannot control.
But what can you control?
You can control your initiative to talk to the donor.
You can work to build an authentic and positive relationship. One with respect. One with mutual admiration for the cause of the nonprofit. One that is professional.
You can ask your donors a question to see if they’re interested in donating. A question that ends in a question mark, giving the person an opportunity to be helpful about a cause they really care about.
You can ask open-ended questions to get to know the person as a real person. What are they passionate about? How did they get to where they are today? How do they spend their free time? How did they meet their partner? What are they working on professionally?
You can think of (and treat) your donor as a person. A person who breathes. Drinks water. Forgets to respond to emails. Has multiple priorities they are juggling at any one time.
You can be super clear in what you’re asking. Not just asking about “support.” You can ask for a donation with a specific amount or specific range, guiding the donor with a benchmark for their giving.
You can ask a question to the donor seeking their financial support and then stop selling by shutting the F*** up to let them consider the request and allow them to answer.
You can consider the “ask” is not the beginning nor the end of the conversation. The ask is one step in the fundraising and solicitation process. If the donor is surprised you are making an ask, then what happened prior? Did you treat them as a person? Did you listen to them?
You can remember that a no in response to your ask is not the worst thing that could happen. A no is an opportunity to ask more questions. A no provides more information. A no removes some uncertainty. A no might lead to a different outcome. A better outcome.
What is worse than all that?
Never asking someone to see if they’re interested.
Never asking someone to see if this matters to them.
Never asking someone to let them take action on something they care about prevents them from that wonderful feeling of knowing they made a difference.
Nonprofit leaders - Here’s a question for you:
What if every day, your development staff started each day knowing what to do next. They knew who to speak to. When to speak to them. What to say. What to ask for. How to build a relationship with their prospects and donors.
Imagine what that could do for your fundraising.
That’s the kind of work we could do together, perhaps in a solicitation training for your staff or volunteers. Interested in exploring what that could look like?